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I’m so glad God decided to drop you into the world yesterday. Otherwise, my list of ‘People to Blame for Everything’ would be dangerously empty. You’re welcome for the job security! 😌🔥"
"I was sitting there thinking, 'Man, I really need someone to pin this mess on,' and then I remembered—God literally just made you. Perfect timing! Consider this your official notification that everything is now your fault. 😂🙏"
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